Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
AMBROSE BIERCEPresent, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
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April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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