All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCEPresent, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
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LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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