Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCELAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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