Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
AMBROSE BIERCEMad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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