Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCELaughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
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RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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