Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
ALAN KINGWe watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
More Alan King Quotes
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn’t let him cut my nails.
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One thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
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That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
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An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
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My lawyer said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?” I said, “Fire and theft.” The lawyer frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.”
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You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
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Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
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Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
ALAN KING