When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, ‘You’re doing a Jewish act.’
ALAN KINGMy mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
More Alan King Quotes
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
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My lawyer said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?” I said, “Fire and theft.” The lawyer frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.”
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
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Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
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We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or ‘stage’ Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
ALAN KING