This is why the terrorists hate us. And it’s not the glitter and it’s not the pomp and circumstance.
ADAM CAROLLAI get depressed at airports.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.
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Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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I don’t like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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If you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
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I’ve always boxed, I always taught boxing.
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I’d be at someone’s house or be up on the roof all day and I’d get lonely – stir crazy – and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life.
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If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
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Rich people don’t pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes – they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn’t pay taxes.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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Everyone keeps saying, “Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating.” It’s like saying, “How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she’s been with Brad Pitt?” I don’t care.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.
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So most people don’t have the courage to admit there’s no God and they know it. They feel it. They try to suppress it. And if you bring it up they get angry because it freaks them out.
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I’m not sexist, I’m just a realist.
ADAM CAROLLA