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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

Adam Carolla

There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
ADAM CAROLLA

Agnostic Atheist Away Bigger Cancer Christian Screening Take
Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLA

Head Hungarian Paprikash Reader Some Toss World
My first car was a motorcycle.
ADAM CAROLLA

Buy Car First Mine Motorcycle Vehicles
I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
ADAM CAROLLA

Amount Art Get Joke Naked People Probably Reality Standing Telling Thinking
My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
ADAM CAROLLA

Government Kind Mom Occasional Participated Welfare
I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
ADAM CAROLLA

All Artistic Different Favorite Podcasting Radio Script
You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
ADAM CAROLLA

Anything Eating Funny Humor Microwave Six Take
Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
ADAM CAROLLA

Christmas Country Dad Every Imagine Seeing Three Year
I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
ADAM CAROLLA

Click Daughter Dude Funnier Gonna Mediocre Sense Staff Tell Writer
It’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
ADAM CAROLLA

Acclimate Anything Funny Kid
No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
ADAM CAROLLA

Book Comedian Comedy Enjoy Fun Read Reader
Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
ADAM CAROLLA

Check Up Doctor Funny Health Heapatist Humor Taste
I’d be at someone’s house or be up on the roof all day and I’d get lonely – stir crazy – and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life.
ADAM CAROLLA

Crazy Funny House Lonely Ratio Roof Someone Talk
You don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Cruise Feeling Good Internet Name Walk
People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
ADAM CAROLLA

College Look People Smart White
I don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
ADAM CAROLLA

Anything Connection Each Emotional Mom Other Understanding

I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.

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