There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
ADAM CAROLLAThere’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
ADAM CAROLLAToss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLAMy first car was a motorcycle.
ADAM CAROLLAI think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
ADAM CAROLLAMy mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
ADAM CAROLLAI liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
ADAM CAROLLAYou shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
ADAM CAROLLAThose dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
ADAM CAROLLAI’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
ADAM CAROLLAIt’s funny when you’re a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
ADAM CAROLLANo, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
ADAM CAROLLAMmm, tastes like hepatitis!
ADAM CAROLLAI’d be at someone’s house or be up on the roof all day and I’d get lonely – stir crazy – and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life.
ADAM CAROLLAYou don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
ADAM CAROLLAPeople look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
ADAM CAROLLAI don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
ADAM CAROLLA