No one is depressed when they’re being chased by a bear.
ADAM CAROLLAI’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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California is like the hot blond high school chick who’s been getting by on her looks, but now she’s 45 and falling apart.
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My first car was a motorcycle.
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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
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That’s the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can’t pursue your dream till you’re 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.
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You have the unenviable choice between being dropped off last or being dropped off first and having a bunch of losers who can’t afford cab fare and have no friends or loved ones with cars knowing exactly where you live.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.
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We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
ADAM CAROLLA