So most people don’t have the courage to admit there’s no God and they know it. They feel it. They try to suppress it. And if you bring it up they get angry because it freaks them out.
ADAM CAROLLAIt’s something I’ve always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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It’s something I’ve always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
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I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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Maybe I’m delusional but I’m usually funny. It’s not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average.
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Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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I get depressed at airports.
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When you’re picking a basketball team, you’ll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you’re playing the odds.
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If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.
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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can’t just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
ADAM CAROLLA






