I’ve never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I’ve never left behind.
ADAM CAROLLAIt’s something I’ve always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they’re making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I get depressed at airports.
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I am not agnostic. I am atheist. I don’t think there is no God; I know there’s no God. I know there’s no God the same way I know many other laws in our universe.
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I didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
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I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I’ve worked with women, I’ve never had an issue with women.
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We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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We’re always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I’m not sure why.
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There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader.
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
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Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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. It’s an even wooden floor, and may the best man or woman win. And I say God bless Dancing with the Stars, and God bless the USA.
ADAM CAROLLA






