I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
ADAM CAROLLAThe reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.
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All’s the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
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Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.
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There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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I don’t normally vote. I’m lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
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I’d never hurt another person.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
ADAM CAROLLA