Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
ADAM CAROLLAI’ve always boxed, I always taught boxing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera – sort of low-key. I don’t like being on camera stuff that much.
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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can’t just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
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My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
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If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they’d be off TV. They’re not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we’d know who she was?
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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We’re always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
ADAM CAROLLA






