“We’d all like to vote for the best man but he’s never a candidate.”

There’s another advantage to being poor – a doctor will cure you faster.

Some folks seem to have descended from the chimpanzee much later than others.

A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.

My idea of walking into the jaws of death is marrying some woman who has lost three husbands.

The hardest thing is writing a recommendation for someone we know.

A never-failing way to get rid of a fellow is to tell him something for his own good.

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.

When some folks agree with my opinions I begin to suspect I’m wrong.

If there’s anything a public servant hates to do it’s something for the public.

There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose.

It ain’t a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you’re talking about.

It’s what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.

Nothing dispels enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

Most of the actors have said “this is the best role they’ve ever had.” So you know, that’s important to me.

For me, it’s always best to just push everything out and just disappear by myself alone somewhere – and it’s kind of like a need of mine.

We have no issue with seeking to develop the best terms we can with Iran.

We still have the opportunity to make our best choice.

Okay, using the dreaded middle name is not the best way to forge a bond.

In my mind I’m the best pitcher in the league.

Any time you lose a few in a row, you have to hit reset and come back tomorrow and do the best you can to forget about how the past series went. It’s frustrating.

The best mannered people make the most absurd lovers.