When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
GEORGE BURNSIt’s good to be here. At 98, it’s good to be anywhere.
More George Burns Quotes
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The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
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Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
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Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up.
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Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
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At my age flowers scare me.
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You’ve got to be honest; if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I can’t afford to die; I’d lose too much money.
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
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I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
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Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
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It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.
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I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
GEORGE BURNS