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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.

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I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
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Modesty is not one of my virtues.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
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There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
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Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
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When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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