A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
ALAN KINGI was a high school throw-out.
More Alan King Quotes
-
-
When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
ALAN KING -
Let’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
ALAN KING -
Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
ALAN KING -
An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KING -
It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
ALAN KING -
I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
ALAN KING -
When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
ALAN KING -
I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again.
ALAN KING -
My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
ALAN KING -
Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
ALAN KING -
That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
ALAN KING -
If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
ALAN KING -
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING -
I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
ALAN KING -
Modesty is not one of my virtues.
ALAN KING