Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
AMBROSE BIERCEAn election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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