PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
AMBROSE BIERCEDemocracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
-
-
Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
AMBROSE BIERCE