The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
NORM MACDONALDI don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
-
-
Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
NORM MACDONALD -
In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
NORM MACDONALD -
The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
NORM MACDONALD -
The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
NORM MACDONALD -
When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
NORM MACDONALD -
Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
NORM MACDONALD -
We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
NORM MACDONALD -
I don’t have any ambition.
NORM MACDONALD -
Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
NORM MACDONALD -
Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
NORM MACDONALD -
Few people love with the violence they hate.
NORM MACDONALD -
You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALD -
I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
NORM MACDONALD -
Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
NORM MACDONALD -
The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
NORM MACDONALD