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I like to reminisce with people I don’t know.

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Bagwalas

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I’m a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I’ll forget.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Forget Funny Myself
I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Food Funny Myself Service Time
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Advice Bird Deep Funny Patience Worm
It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I’d never even thought about killing myself.
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Funny Kill Learning Love Myself Time
If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
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Destroy Evidence Success Try Yourself
If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren’t people from Holland called Holes?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Country Funny Nation People
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’
STEVEN WRIGHT

Abandonment Book Build Funny Myself Ocean Yourself
I like to reminisce with people I don’t know.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Myself People
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Literature Word Wrong
Everyone has a photographic Memory, some just don’t have film.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Memories Photograph Yourself
I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Car Funny Yourself
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Distance Time Walk Yourself
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Difference Ideas Person Research Steal
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Future One Liner Planning
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Appearance Different Fingers Hands
I got a new dog. He’s a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he’s not sure what I threw him.
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Animal Dog Himself Myself Return

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