I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
SPIKE MILLIGANI shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
-
-
How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
A lot of learning can be a little thing.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I’m Irish. We think sideways.
SPIKE MILLIGAN