Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery’s dead?
STEVEN WRIGHTWhy do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery’s dead?
STEVEN WRIGHTWhy don’t they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
STEVEN WRIGHTWhy, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
STEVEN WRIGHTHalf the people you know are below average.
STEVEN WRIGHTClones are people two.
STEVEN WRIGHTHow come abbreviated is such a long word?
STEVEN WRIGHTOne time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, “Didn’t you see the stop sign?” I said, “Yeah, but I don’t believe everything I read”
STEVEN WRIGHTWhy is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?
STEVEN WRIGHTI couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
STEVEN WRIGHTI’m a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I’ll forget.
STEVEN WRIGHTMonday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
STEVEN WRIGHTImagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
STEVEN WRIGHTI think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
STEVEN WRIGHTI intend to live forever. So far, so good.
STEVEN WRIGHTHow come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
STEVEN WRIGHTI like to reminisce with people I don’t know.
STEVEN WRIGHT