black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.

W. C. Fields

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Home
I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
W. C. FIELDS

Easy Time Yourself
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. FIELDS

Hands Life Yourself
You can’t cheat an honest man.
W. C. FIELDS

Honesty Man Yourself
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. FIELDS

Friendship Life Marriage Necessary Old Relationship
I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.
W. C. FIELDS

Argument Attitude Myself
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS

Fools Inspirational Quit Success Yourself
When you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Wake Up Yourself
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Hands Myself See
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Experience Life
Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FIELDS

Better Sex Worst
Comedy is a serious business. A serious business with only one purpose -to make people laugh.
W. C. FIELDS

Business Laugh Oneself People Purpose Serious
I didn’t squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn’t see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Food Myself See

I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes