black
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If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.

W. C. Fields

I drink therefore I am.
W. C. FIELDS

Instagram Captions Myself One Liner
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDS

Believe Empty Food Myself Weird
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. FIELDS

Friendship Life Marriage Necessary Old Relationship
During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Live Lost Struggle Travel
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. FIELDS

Break One Liner
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FIELDS

Better Sex Worst
Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one’s present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason.
W. C. FIELDS

Excellence Friendship Future Present Reason Remember
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Hope Life Lost
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Advice Age Alcohol Authority Give Up Myself
Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness… I thought I’d lost it.
W. C. FIELDS

Goodness Lost Myself Night Thankful
I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDS

Age Food Myself Need
Yes I do like children, Girl children, about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself Woman
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Experience Life
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Money Poor Rich
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Funny Man Myself

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.

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If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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