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Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.

W. C. Fields

You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS

Enough Fools Live People Time Yourself
Don’t worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. FIELDS

Heart Live Worry Yourself
There’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Parents Tough
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Control Food Myself Strong
I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Money Myself Wild Woman
This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.
W. C. FIELDS

Drive Grateful Myself Reason
Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
W. C. FIELDS

Food Funny
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Food Myself
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. FIELDS

Hands Life Yourself
If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Funny Wings
I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Live Myself
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDS

Happiness Instagram Captions Money Place
If it is a joint return, we are instructed to print the given names of both husband and wife. But since some of the names that husband and wife give each other are hardly suited to print, we must proceed cautiously.
W. C. FIELDS

Care Husband Wife
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS

Worth Wrong
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself

Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.

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Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.

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