Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work, or prison.
TIM ALLENBut separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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My stepfather stepped in where no man would’ve stepped in – six kids, five of them boys – and that’s heroic.
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The ego is like a kid in the basement: It’s best to keep him busy.
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Anytime you work with animals, you begin to see more humanity in them.
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But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
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I have always enjoyed do-it-yourself projects, .. Being in a position to actually help design and bring tools to market is an incredible opportunity. Being able to fund charities as a result is phenomenal.
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To get a man’s attention, just stand in front of the TV and don’t move. He’ll talk to you. I promise.
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Dog’s listen, or appear to listen. I think they hear blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah. They appear to be listening to you.
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Before Kady was born, I didn’t think having a kid would be such a big deal. My attitude was simple: Babies are nice, play with them, put them in the closet until the next time.
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I had a very easy time loving an audience. But when it’s one-on-one with somebody, all I wanted to do was run away, because maybe they’re going to want something from me I can’t give, or they’re going to hurt me.
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I am a thespian trapped in a man’s body.
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Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.
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My comedy is not mine. It’s a gift. I’m not that smart.
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I have an only child. She’s so independent and good with adults.
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I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that’s a good thing.
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I have a thing for tools.
TIM ALLEN






