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No one is listening until you make a mistake.

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Listening Mistake Yourself

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Clones are people two.
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One Liner People
I’m addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn’t matter.
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Addiction Difference Myself Quit
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
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Appearance Funny Hairs Stick
Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
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Appearance Imagination Phone Weird Yourself
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
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If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
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Buy Fame Friendship Herself Popular Toy
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, “Got any shoes you’re not using?
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Funny Man Sad Yourself
My doctor told me I shouldn’t work out until I’m in better shape. I told him, ‘All right; don’t send me a bill until I pay you.’
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Better Doctor Myself Pay Right Work Yourself
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’
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Abandonment Book Build Funny Myself Ocean Yourself
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
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Listening Mistake Yourself
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
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Appearance Different Fingers Hands
The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, ‘Where the hell is my roof?
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Bed Funny Hell Home Myself Nature Night Stars Wonder
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don’t they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the postmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?
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Crime Man Office Photograph Writing
I went for a walk last night and she asked me how long I was going to be gone. I said, ‘The whole time.
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Funny Herself Myself Night Time Walk
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
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Drive Learning Yourself
Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
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Forget Myself Right Thinking Time

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