To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
STEVEN WRIGHTWhenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
More Steven Wright Quotes
-
-
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?
STEVEN WRIGHT -
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery’s dead?
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m six I’ll be ninety.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
I installed a skylight in my apartment, the people who live above me are furious!
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Everyone has a photographic Memory, some just don’t have film.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
STEVEN WRIGHT -
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
STEVEN WRIGHT -
You know what scares me? When you have to be nice to some paranoid schizophrenic, just because she lives in your head.
STEVEN WRIGHT