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People are saying that I’m an alcoholic, and that’s not true, because I only drink when I work, and I’m a workaholic.

Ron White

I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
RON WHITE

Chill Critical Keep Product Spaghetti
I don’t watch Comedy Central. I don’t enjoy it.
RON WHITE

Central Comedy Enjoy Watch
It never dawned on me that I had the option of becoming a comedian. I come from a little dirt street town in northwest Texas, and they really don’t talk about the arts there much on career day.
RON WHITE

Become Comedy Dirt Drawn Little Northwest Option Street Tear Town
I’ve gathered some of my close musical and comedian friends, and we’re going to see if we can’t bring a few laughs to these soldiers, raise some money, and hopefully lift their spirits.
RON WHITE

Bring Friend Gather Hopefully Laugh New Soldier Spirit
I was a little one-trick pony. I do what I’ve always done. That’s really where my best stuff comes from. I don’t know how it happens. It just happens.
RON WHITE

Always Best Done Happen Little One Pony Stuff Trick
If I’m not in the theatre, I’m in an open mic night or doing a guest set at the Comedy Club, or whatever, just trying to develop stuff.
RON WHITE

Club Comedy Devote Doing Guest Mic Open Stuff Theatre Try
If I see someone out there mouthing the words to a bit, I’m not having fun.
RON WHITE

Fun Have Mouth See Someone Word
I’d rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
RON WHITE

Big Good Part Rather Really
You can teach somebody how to be a brain surgeon, but you cannot teach them how to walk on a stage and make people laugh.
RON WHITE

Brain Laugh People Somebody Stage Surgeon Teach Walk
I always wanted to be a popular comedian.
RON WHITE

Always Comedian Popular Want
I guarantee there’s people who watch television who have no idea how complicated it is to make a television show.
RON WHITE

Complicate Guarantee Ideas People Show Television Watch
I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
RON WHITE

Country Start Drop Education Reason Surplus Think
I’ve asked these guys in rock bands with all the 18-wheelers driving to the venue how they make money. I just don’t understand it. But I don’t understand a lot of things.
RON WHITE

Ask Band Guy Monkey Rock Understand Venue
I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.
RON WHITE

Advice Friend Go Mine Show Solicite Talk
I have a very fun life. I don’t recommend it for anybody else, but it sure has been fun for me.
RON WHITE

Else Fun Life Recommend Sure Very
Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
RON WHITE

Brother Come Later Number Operate Phone See Something

People are saying that I’m an alcoholic, and that’s not true, because I only drink when I work, and I’m a workaholic.

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People are saying that I’m an alcoholic, and that’s not true, because I only drink when I work, and I’m a workaholic.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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