To get a roaster clean, send something like baked apples in it to a neighbor. Neighbors always return pans spotless, and you won’t have to use a blow torch on it like you usually do.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller I’m looking for a perfume to overpower men – I’m sick of karate.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller Remarrying a husband you’ve divorced is like having your appendix put back in.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller It’s true Fang and I fight, but we’ve never gone to bed mad. Of course, one year we were up for three months.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Phyllis DillerPhyllis Diller How strange that our hearts heal from the same thing that broke it -love.
Cailin HargreavesCailin Hargreaves The peak of intensity is numbness not emotionless.
Anamika GargAnamika Garg She is everything and nothing at all.
Ava NicoleAva Nicole She built her castle at rock bottom.
Harriet SelinaHarriet Selina Keep growing into yourself.
Sophia JoanSophia Joan They tell you to be grateful for what you have. But you are also allowed to be sad for what you have lost.
Sabina LauraSabina Laura
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