The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
NORM MACDONALDWe often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it’s the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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Though we may not desire to detect fraud, we must not, on that account, endeavor to be insensible of it, for, as cunning is a crime, so is duplicity a fault, and if men dread knaves, they also despise fools.
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As evacuation eases the body, so occasional ejectment of passion seems to appease the agonies of the soul, and dispose to tranquility the agitations of the heart.
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There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
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The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
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I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
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I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
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The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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This would have been a great game to watch if we didn’t have any money on it.
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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another; but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
NORM MACDONALD






