We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
NORM MACDONALDThey say that if you’re afraid of homosexuals, it means that deep down inside you’re actually a homosexual yourself. That worries me because I’m afraid of dogs.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.
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Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
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The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
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There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
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Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
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They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
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The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.
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I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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A lot of writers come from Harvard and such, and are rich, and they write under the misapprehension that poor people are stupid. So when they do write them, they are hillbillies or rednecks or Christian idiots.
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When people told the audience that [Sam Kinison] was good, he was accepted after that.
NORM MACDONALD