I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
NORM MACDONALDAll that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
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The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
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If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it.
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
NORM MACDONALD