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Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.

Lily Tomlin

When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Cry Feeling Happiness Laughter Price Sad
Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.
LILY TOMLIN

Adult Country Election Hard Work
If trying harder doesn’t work, try softer.
LILY TOMLIN

Hard Inspirational Motivational Perspective Soft Try
Every day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Impossible Myself News Reading
Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Funny Myself Serious
Infinity is just time on an ego trip.
LILY TOMLIN

Ego Infinity One Liner Time Trip
Remember we’re all in this alone.
LILY TOMLIN

Alone One Liner Remember
No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Change Enough Myself Transformation
If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you’re not considered well viewed.
LILY TOMLIN

Book Hypocrisy Reading View Yourself
I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else.
LILY TOMLIN

Myself Thinking Worry
I worry about kids today – because of the sexual revolution, they’re going to grow up and never know what “dirty” means.
LILY TOMLIN

Children Dirty Myself Revolution Sex Worry
I feel some part of me can wake up and be very existential and the next day wake up and be sort of in love with the universe.
LILY TOMLIN

Existence Feeling Love Universe Wake Up
If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Creature Death Evolution Laughter Survive Worth
Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.
LILY TOMLIN

Feeling Imagination Myself
I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves; I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
LILY TOMLIN

Collection Conscious Feeling Humor Vehicle Wonderful
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
LILY TOMLIN

Hard Time Struggle Worst
What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.
LILY TOMLIN

Audience Brain Knowledge Myself Praise Thinking
I always wondered why somebody doesn’t do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.
LILY TOMLIN

Action Deep Inspirational Motivational Myself
Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Laughter Smart Survive Work
Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.
LILY TOMLIN

Lying Make Up True Yourself
If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
LILY TOMLIN

Love Question Yourself
We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
LILY TOMLIN

Believe Freedom Hands Man Reason Sex Walk
Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?
LILY TOMLIN

Feeling Mindset Yourself
We are people with lives, not consumers with lifestyles.
LILY TOMLIN

Consumption Life Live People Style
It’s a more ridiculing, divisive humor today.
LILY TOMLIN

Change Comedy Humor Present Ridicule
The road to success is always under construction.
LILY TOMLIN

Construction Inspirational Road Success
What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
LILY TOMLIN

Expectation Philosophy Yourself

Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.

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Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.

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