Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
LILY TOMLINYou can’t expect insights, even the big ones, to make you suddenly understand everything. But I figure: Hey it’s a step in the right direction if they leave you confused in a deeper way.
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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In the depths of the night, fear grips my heart. It paralyzes my mind. But most of all, I feel very, very alone
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Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
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When we speak to God, we call it prayer; when God speaks back, we call it psychosis!
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What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
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If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.
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No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
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Did you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?
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We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
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9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn’t really happened, but it has come closer.
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When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one.
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After all, in private, we’re all misfits.
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Creating characters is just another way to express a type and put that type to use.
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It’s a more ridiculing, divisive humor today.
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We don’t care. We don’t have to. We’re the phone company.
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Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.
LILY TOMLIN