First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
GEORGE BURNSI can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
More George Burns Quotes
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Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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I’m at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
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I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
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Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman – or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
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I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
GEORGE BURNS -
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
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How can I die? I’m booked.
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I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
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I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
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You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.
GEORGE BURNS -
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
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Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere.
GEORGE BURNS