I’m not black, but there’s a whole lot of times I wish I could say I’m not white.
FRANK ZAPPAThere is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it’s going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.
More Frank Zappa Quotes
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The computer can’t tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what’s missing is the eyebrows.
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Jazz isn’t dead. It just smells funny.
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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
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There’s a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
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The difference between religions and cults is determined by how much real estate is owned.
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My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
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The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.
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Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.
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There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we’d all love one another.
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Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something, uses that something to support their own existence.
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Censoring what you say is one of the ways in which people who are not nice can take away your personal freedom.
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A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
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To me absurdity is the only reality.
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The more you can escape from how horrible things really are, the less it’s going to bother you and then, the worse things get.
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There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
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Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.
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It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out the uglier everything seems.
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Modern music is people who can’t think signing artists who can’t write songs to make records for people who can’t hear.
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It’s better to have something to remember than anything to regret.
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We pretend to be a free society, and we pretend to be an adult society, but if you look at the facts, our news is just as contrived, and controlled as Pravda!
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I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
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Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?
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Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.
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The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.
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A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.
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The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it’s profitable to continue the illusion.
FRANK ZAPPA