Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.
FRAN LEBOWITZDesigner clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
More Fran Lebowitz Quotes
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In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.
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The opposite of talking isn’t listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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I must take issue with the term ‘a mere child’, for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
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I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.
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Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
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There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior.
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Scientists – the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
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Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.
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The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.
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Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
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Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
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Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
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If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.
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Don’t bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.
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Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step – it is an old business procedure.
FRAN LEBOWITZ