“Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.”

All God’s children are not beautiful. Most of God’s children are, in fact, barely presentable.

Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.

I must take issue with the term ‘a mere child’, for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.

Scientists – the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.

My favorite animal is steak.

Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.

Nothing succeeds like address.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don’t even try.

You’re only as good as your last haircut.

Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step – it is an old business procedure.

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.

Ifyou have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.

If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.

Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.

We cut him off and there was nowhere for him to go but out of bounds … It’s still the greatest move I’ve ever seen in basketball, the all-time greatest.

I’m calling on the Supreme Leader of North Korea, or as I call him, ‘Kim,’ to do me a solid and cut Kenneth Bae loose.

The world is not the most pleasant place. Eventually, your parents leave you and nobody is going to go out of their way to protect you unconditionally.

They fought their way to control by rebate and drawback, bribe and blackmail, espionage and price cutting, by ruthless efficiency of organization.

From better access to American markets for our beef and lamb farmers, to cutting tariffs on dairy products like cheese, which are up to 17 per cent, there are significant opportunities for UK farming.

The nineteenth century lynching mob cuts off ears, toes, and fingers, strips off flesh, and distributes portions of the body as souvenirs among the crowd.

My mother had very humble beginnings – to put it mildly. Her dad built their home out of timber that he cut down on their land. No heat, no air-conditioning – ‘no foolishness,’ as he would call it.

Cut away all that is excessive, straighten all that is crooked, bring light to all that is overcast, labour to make all one glow of beauty and never cease chiselling your statue.