If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.
FRAN LEBOWITZYou’re only as good as your last haircut.
More Fran Lebowitz Quotes
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No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
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The opposite of talking isn’t listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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Ifyou have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.
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When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.
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Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.
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If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
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To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
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Scientists – the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
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Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
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Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
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If you’re going to America, bring your own food.
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I must take issue with the term ‘a mere child’, for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
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Your life story would not make a good book. Don’t even try.
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Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
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Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
FRAN LEBOWITZ