If you’re going to America, bring your own food.
FRAN LEBOWITZIf you’re going to America, bring your own food.
FRAN LEBOWITZI place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word – politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit.
FRAN LEBOWITZThe conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.
FRAN LEBOWITZAsk your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying.
FRAN LEBOWITZDesigner clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
FRAN LEBOWITZOriginal thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.
FRAN LEBOWITZVerbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
FRAN LEBOWITZIf you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
FRAN LEBOWITZRemember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you.
FRAN LEBOWITZWhen you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.
FRAN LEBOWITZMy favorite animal is steak.
FRAN LEBOWITZNature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
FRAN LEBOWITZContrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step – it is an old business procedure.
FRAN LEBOWITZI never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.
FRAN LEBOWITZIfyou have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.
FRAN LEBOWITZAll God’s children are not beautiful. Most of God’s children are, in fact, barely presentable.
FRAN LEBOWITZ