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You can’t go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.

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Character Do Help Hope Moral Most People Pretend

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Algebra Assure Conscious Life Real Refuse Stand Such Thing
Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one. It’s a drug. It distorts reality, and that’s the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Distort Drug Illness Impossible Love Mental Pleasurable Point Really Romantic Saw
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Attempt Behaviour Constitute Inner Nervous Peace Something Such Thing Unacceptable
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Buy Child Dinner Only Want
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Dog Owner Suggest Sweater Tail Were
You’re only as good as your last haircut.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Good Haircut Last Only
Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Back Cloth Hotel Relinquish Specified Tell Want
Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Before Could Happen Met Original People Possible Thought
I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word – politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Anything Behav Behave Courtesy Gently Heart High Morale People Politeness Repelinet Spirit Value
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Action Contemplation Evidence Louder Nature Opinion Peortic Speak Suicide Word
Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Chair Comfortable Door Enough Found Large Location Nature Out
In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Capitalism Communism Country Democracy Orient Over Triumphed Union
Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Happy Hear Life Phone Remember Stage Teenage
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Actual Being Excuse Football Good Interest Male Play Simply Special Transsexual Woman
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Drink Good Other People Talk Telephone Way
Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Adult Between Consent exchange Interest Little Private Probably Verbal

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