All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
ERMA BOMBECKI remember thinking how often we look, but never see … we listen, but never hear … we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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When you’re lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
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I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
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The grass is always greener over the septic tank.
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The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
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No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.
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He who laughs lasts.
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Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it’s still snowing.
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As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
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Some emotions don’t make a lot of noise. It’s hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint – like a heartbeat. And pure love – why, some days it’s so quiet, you don’t even know it’s there.
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Once you see the drivers in Indonesia you understand why religion plays such a part in their lives.
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There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
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A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn’t charge more after midnight – or anything before midnight.
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There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
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I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.
ERMA BOMBECK