It is my theory you can’t get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.
ERMA BOMBECKI remember thinking how often we look, but never see … we listen, but never hear … we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip.
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Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
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My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
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Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?
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Friends are “annuals” that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a “perennial” that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There’s a place in the garden for both of them.
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When humor goes, there goes civilization.
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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
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He who laughs lasts.
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I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
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There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
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The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
ERMA BOMBECK