It is my theory you can’t get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.
ERMA BOMBECK
Cats invented self-esteem.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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It is my theory you can’t get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Children make your life important.
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My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
ERMA BOMBECK -
As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
ERMA BOMBECK -
I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.
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Every puppy should have a boy.
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Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.
ERMA BOMBECK -
If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
ERMA BOMBECK -
It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: THIS WILL VARY WITH YOUR MICROWAVE. Loosely translated, this means, You’re on your own, Bernice.
ERMA BOMBECK -
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation’s compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
ERMA BOMBECK -
A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
ERMA BOMBECK