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That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.

Bob Hope

If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.
BOB HOPE

Balls Golf Nation Slice Worry
Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
BOB HOPE

Business Golf Green Pay
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE

Christmas Holiday Old Fashioned Xmas
Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
BOB HOPE

Careers Dying Line One
Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don’t worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
BOB HOPE

Blow Home Hurricane Tornadoes Typhoon Worry
Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.
BOB HOPE

Beach Golf Grass Pebbles
Bing Crosby and I weren’t the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other.
BOB HOPE

Doing Nothing Kissing Light
Please don’t stand up on my account.
BOB HOPE

Account Line One Please Stand
I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE

Men President Six
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Invested Sweater
To give you an idea of how fast we travelled – we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.
BOB HOPE

Arrive Giving Ideas Still Two
You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
BOB HOPE

Fans Letters Raspberries
I only speak a little pigeon French. Just enough to get by with the little French pigeons.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Littles
He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE

Balls Go Golf Yards
A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE

Men One Line Religious
It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hilarious Sympathy Witty

That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.

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That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.

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Popular Authors

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