Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn’t hear them.
BOB HOPEOne of our stock lines used to be “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Bing, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me.” And that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other!
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
BOB HOPE -
Please don’t stand up on my account.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’
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If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
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Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.
BOB HOPE -
I come around to your house personally and wet your finger while you’re turning the pages.
BOB HOPE -
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
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There was nothing subtle about our landing. The pilot just pointed the nose at the ground and let her rip.
BOB HOPE -
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
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We didn’t know that in America after the war, you wouldn’t be able to get into a sushi joint without a reservation. And we thought they lost.
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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
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One of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we’ll have her forever.
BOB HOPE -
I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPE