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Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.

Bob Hope

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor’s Orphanage – he shot both his parents and moved in.
BOB HOPE

Actors Comedy Parent
I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
BOB HOPE

Animal Running White
You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
BOB HOPE

Fans Letters Raspberries
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE

Country Day Every Get Over People
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
BOB HOPE

Apart Dog Miles Pet Tree
At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides their press agents.
BOB HOPE

Acting Awards Hollywood Press Thinking
For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
BOB HOPE

Ashes Country Funny Humorous People
To give you an idea of how fast we travelled – we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.
BOB HOPE

Arrive Giving Ideas Still Two
By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.
BOB HOPE

Eighteen Engaged Finished Foursome
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE

Christmas Holiday Old Fashioned Xmas
The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
BOB HOPE

Before Draw Engage Money Only Trouble
I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humble Humor
Timing is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Definitely Essence Life
The home videos aren’t as good, but they are seeming to get better.
BOB HOPE

Better Get Home Video
I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.
BOB HOPE

Age Golf Play Tried Weight

Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.

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Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.

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