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Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.

Bob Hope

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE

Balls Go Golf Yards
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Kids Wonderful
The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
BOB HOPE

Jesus News Pissed
England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there.
BOB HOPE

England Funny Humorous Performance
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE

Book Funny Reading
When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor’s Orphanage – he shot both his parents and moved in.
BOB HOPE

Actors Comedy Parent
I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
BOB HOPE

Animal Running White
I come around to your house personally and wet your finger while you’re turning the pages.
BOB HOPE

Extra Pages Personally Turning
I led such a sheltered life I didn’t go out with girls until I was almost four.
BOB HOPE

Four Girl Lives Sheltered
We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
BOB HOPE

Ashes Country Funny Humorous People
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
BOB HOPE

Golf Green Pay
We had a very successful trip to Russia. We made it back.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Successful
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
BOB HOPE

Dieting Friend Good Loss Weight
Failure is the only thing I’ve ever been a success at.
BOB HOPE

Decent Garden State
It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hilarious Sympathy Witty
If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.
BOB HOPE

Balls Golf Nation Slice Worry

Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.

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Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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