I think what’s dangerous is the idea that someone can wash away your sins.
BILL MAHERSuicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’
More Bill Maher Quotes
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I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.
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I feel like I’m wearing orthopedic shoes, because I stand corrected.
BILL MAHER -
What is it with conservatives? Seriously, I’m not trying to be partisan but it seems like if they’re anti-illegal alien, they have illegal aliens working for them. If they’re anti-gay, they turn out to be gay. If they’re super Christian, they’re a witch.
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Beating Newt Gingrich in a popularity contest is like beating Stephen Hawking in ‘Dancing with the Stars.’
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You can always tell when Obama’s negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he’s missing his watch and his lunch money.
BILL MAHER -
Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
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I feel terrible for a Palestinian child who dies. But, if it’s your father, your brother or your uncle who was firing those rockets into Israel, whose fault is it really? Do you really expect the Israelis not to retaliate?
BILL MAHER -
The whole dating ritual was different when I was a kid. Girls got pinned, not nailed.
BILL MAHER -
The difference between the three Abrahamic religions: Christianity – mumbling to the ceiling, Judaism – mumbling to the wall, Islam – mumbling to the floor.
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The cable TV sex channels don’t expand our horizons, don’t make us better people, and don’t come in clearly enough.
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Talk to women who’ve ever dated an Arab man. The results are not good.
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Don’t get so tolerant that you tolerate intolerance.
BILL MAHER -
Religion is insanity by consensus.
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I have always defined political correctness as an elevation of sensitivity over truth.
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Maybe a president who didn’t believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.
BILL MAHER