In an average moral universal society, good people will try to do the right thing, and psychotic people will do wicked things. But if you want to make good people do wicked things, you need them to be religious.
BILL MAHERReligion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don’t need.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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I’m for the death penalty, I’m pro-abortion, I’m pro-assisted suicide, I’m pro-regular suicide. Anything that’ll get the traffic moving.
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You know, there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time, husband!!!
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The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.
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If you want to get rich with a tax free enterprise that sells nothing, start a church.
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People have to stop saying that just because someone is an anti-gay activist they might be gay. They’re DEFINITELY GAY!!
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The Drug War is an addiction, really.
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What I believe in is love your neighbor as yourself and don’t call him stupid because they don’t agree with you politically.
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Trusting the government to monitor your calls without listening. It’s kind of like trusting Chris Christie to pick up the McDonald’s and not eat the fries on the way home.
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If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.
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The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you’ll wind up with a lover.
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During the Depression, or back when we were fighting Hitler, people didn’t have time to sue a company if the coffee was too hot. There were urgent, pressing problems. If you think you have it tough, read history books.
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Just honest. To me, being ‘politically incorrect’ means the opposite of being political — which means to spin everything. That’s all it’s ever meant to me. It’s never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.
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Have you ever met a war you didn’t love? I’m asking, is there any place you don’t want to intervene in?
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Halloween is a day when we all get to fool people into thinking we’re someone else. Or as Mitt Romney calls it, campaigning.
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Here’s the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He’s never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He’s totally – he’s the white Kanye.
BILL MAHER






